Im the Ice Girl freezing you to the bone...
You Found Me@ 10:00 p.m.
Wonderful, we had our first house... missunderstanding fit today. Seven days after moving in. Nicole was on the phone with her Pink haired buddie, Conversation went as followed
Me: Tell him I said hi!
Nicole: Julie says hi.
CellPhone: Tell her I said hello.
Nicole: He sai-
Me: I herd him say hi, hes quite loud :D
CellPhone: (something I cant understand)
Nicole: *giggle* He said, he said Hello not hi you whore.
Then, Chris from downstairs yells up in his angry voice
"Did he just call her a whore? I swear to god Ill kill him myself"
Its wonderful really. I decided this on my own again. I always make bad decissions. I forced chris to move in with me three years ago, I made that decission and forced him to agree with it and now Ive done it again. Ive fucking forced my ideas of moving on nicole and chris. I made it seem like it was a wonderful idea because to me it is. To have my best friend and my fiancee in the same house seemed like a wonderful idea. Its that whole mother fucking jurassic parck shit.
I was so busy wondering if I could do it I didnt stop to think if I should.
I needed a place to move, chris needed to come with me, nicole didnt want to stay at her dads forever so I convinced them we would all be one bit giant happy fucking family. Now I have the two of them unhappy with each other.
Chris is being moody because I, without realizeing it, have been ignoring him. Ive been to busy having fun with nicole that I havent really included him in on much of the fun stuff. I do this everytime I get a friend. I get so happy to have someone that I end up slightly ignoring chris and that makes him moody.
Nicole belives we both think shes a whore and are going to hate her. Shes afraid to invite anyone over now thanks to chrissippoos outbursts and I wonder if maybe shes sitting in her room right now thinking this was all a really bad idea. Way to fucking go julie. Just fuck up everyones lives that you love.
I cant fix it, honestly when you think about it people clash all the time but Chris is hard to get along with and nicole has a mind of her own. I love them both to peices for these reasons.
I need to stop ackting like I can run everyones lives.
The nice part is if Nicole needs a place to go back to she can leave anytime and go back to living with her dad. I dont think she would like that very much but at least she always has the option. Chrissippoos mom today let all of us know that her son can always come back and live with her if things dont work out. You know what, fuck that. Its wonderful that everyone has a place to go back to. Its wonderful that everyone has a family that cares about them except me. I have chris and nicole and no one else. My mother will show semi affection once in a while but that doesnt last.
She blames me for ditching her. Says that I left the house like a bat out of hell. of course I Fucking did she said it was going to get sold out from under us. Was I supposed to stand there and wait for it to happen. I belive that worse case senario, if something happend, nicole would go back to her dad, chris would go back to his mom and somehow i would be forced to go with him. Unfortunatly I dont think I can stand his family enough to survive in that environtment.
As it is hes still calling his family almost every night this week to say good night. Its not even his cell phone. His mom has started calling it back to in hopes of reaching him. Im severly worried if shes going to call it every fucking morning in hopes of talking to her precious baby.
My family is here and now there not at ease with each other. Chris is having some sort of atitude problem and I cant fix it.
I dont want nicole to leave, I dont want chris to leave.
Since I moved out I feel kinda empty in a way, Im happy to have a place, im happy to be on my own but I feel devoid of any family. My mother seemed all to happy to get rid of me, shes even slightly mad about it.
I wonder if this is how nicole felt when she was in maryland last year, that she had done something horrible to make things not work. Its not even really like there at the breaking point its just the first fight but... Chris can be stuborn and nicole gets hurt easily. Why do I get to play mediator. It sucks.
There, I feel a bit better now.
=X Im just going to go get a sex change and play fake video games for the rest of my life and marry Enderance! <3
Sunday, September 16, 2007
You Found Me@ 08:42 a.m.
I dont want to work today. S sleepy, sleepy to the point that Im clsing my eyes to t ype this so that I can consider it a nap time. Im good in that department though, if I know I HAVE to be up well, I get up. I stumble around for a bit like a crazy but I get up. I used to go on the computer right away but since I dont have that set up, or even if I did I wouldnt have internet I tend to come out and make instant oatmeal for breakfast. What will I do when theres no more oat meal? Maybe ill just never wake up!
Rob said something odd to me yesterday, he told me "Next week when Im gone can you do me a favor? Can you just keep Kevin and Taylor calm?" Hes worried because his confrance is next week. How though am I supposed to keep those two calm? Taylor has rabies and Kevin just to odd to discribe.
I saw the Phantom of the Opera yesterday, not the movie mind you but someone we call Phantom of the Opera. He talked to me for a bit until I had to go in the back to make a phone call and misteriously disapeared taking my fifteen minute break to avoid him. When I came bak out though he was gone for five minutes, apparently just off to get himself some coffee from starbucks. The amusing part is you can detor him. Like that zombie in the beginning of the new Dawn of the Dead, the one whos chassing her in her car but when she turns thers a woman on the street so the zombies like OH SHINNY! And chases that lady instead. I steared Hervan off on Rob. Wich was funny because then he started talking about Halo 3 and its release party to wich Rob has no idea!
Robs from like... bumble fuck, and in bumble fuck they allow you to have alot of guns. Wich he now doesnt have by the way. He was in the military and trys very hard to just be a nice polite guy. For some reason his nice ness gets lost somewhere along the way, when hes shipping out an order people always ask him four times if there package is going to get lost in the mail and at least two employees have said that they think rob hates them. His stories are usually depressing and I fear him killing himself in the bathroom of a 7/11 one day in the far off future.
Im not a very good friend lately. I picked on Chrissippoo and Lolo about the grocery shopping they did and then I keep making comments and teasing about Lolo's boyfriend. What the hell kind of friend makes fun of there best friends boyfriend? A bad one thats what kind, a rotton bruised apple friend. She would have been better off having a peice of fruit as her buddie (at least on this one topic). I just... Well especially around Chris I tend to get more sarcastic on certin things. Plus Pinky (lolo's "man") erks me. One of the few times I talked to the guy on the phone he hung up on me because I upset him. Thats when I found out Im an asshole by the way, just figured I would mention that. Its not an insult Im just a bit diffrent in the head so people tend to think Im being a dick when Im just being me.
Either way I need to stop saying bad t hings about this kid. He finaly said he would come visit Nicole instead of her going to see him wich I think is a much more fabulous idea. Something about a girl traveling half way across the countr to visit a guy she only knows online that strikes me as a bit DANGEROUS!!! She sees no problem in it but thanks to my mom Imma lil paranoid weirdo that thinks everyones out to get everyone else! Also Ive "lived" online, people are not what they seem, there personalitys are very diffrent from relaity sometimes. They lie for entertainment. I really cant trust them after what Ive seen.
It really doesnt matter though, Its not my life its hers. Im not her mother Im her friend and I should be supporting her instead of making fun of the guy she likes...
I really am an asshole...
Everything I own is out of my Moms house, except my computer chair but Im nt sure we have room for that. Tomarrow Im going to clean and unpack a bit so we have some room and the place doesnt look so just moved in ish, even though it is just moved in ish when you relaized we only moved in monday and todays saterday.
I need to pick up some bookshelfs and a glass cabinate for my fairies
I really love the appartment, its so cute and cozy, Im just worried the cats will claw on the carpet but since we brought there clawing standy thing they've been behaving very well.
I did some drawing last night with Lolo! Chris was playing dot hack and nicole wanted to draw. She may not be the best at people but she makes the greatest bussyest oddball peices ever!
Chrissippoo seems very happy here and hes always talking about cleaning stuff and decorating wich is good. I think hes just happy to get away from mom...
I typed for twenty minutes and Im still sleepy. Not good.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
You Found Me@ 08:50 a.m.
Bill. I met Bill today, hes the guy I thought was robbing the place yesterday. I think hes a contracter friend of family of Tripple L. Plesent enough but it was early so I wasnt very talkative, pluse I was on a timed missiont to find chrissippoos shirt for work.
I accidentaly depressed myself last night by going to Ambzy-bees old blog, I clicked like... the second link in the archive and it was all "Today was a good day, no GREAT! I talked to Jojo alot last night but what makes it even better was seeing Minty Julie" Uhgh! So sad... I miss her, such a happy cute lil soul. I think Lolo woulda gotten along wonderfully with her, they have alot in common cept... Lolo's like... whats the right word... gangsta? I figured out a while ago that its not because the two are similiar that I like Nicole. I was worried for a while if maybe I saw her as a replacement but thats not true for a few reasons. 1) Ambzy-bee passed away 4ish years ago 2)Nicole may like kirby but nothing can ever rival the love Ambzy had for Link 3) Personality wise Lolo's more aggressive and fussy (not that this is bad or good, just a statment) 4) Lolo's artistic and crafty so she makes things for me sometimes wich is sweet. There are a bunch of little things and a few big ones that asure me that I like Lolo for Lolo and Ambzy for Ambzy. One will never replace the other and vice versa.
So sleepy, the downfall to living with Nicole is if you get causght up in her sleep patern you want to die. She goes to sleep at roughtly between 12-2 and has to wake up around 8ish. The 8ish part isnt working very well for her at the moment even when I try to wake her up. She refuses to leafe the house before 8:50am wich makes her late for work almost every day! Maybe explosives under her bed or a little elecric advice that zaps her once ever minute after 8 getting longer and more intense as time goes by.
I really do not get along with the laptop keyboard, I miss letters when I type sometimes, my hand hurts if I play wow for to long.
Friday, September 14, 2007
You Found Me@ 12:05 a.m.
I belive there was a strange half naked man trying to break into my home today... There was a large black van and when I looked outside a man was stripping, and not an attractive man but a creepy old bike ridding hippie kinda man. Sceevey! So what did I do? Well, Chrissippoo was out at Walgreens for me so I had to protect myself! Thats right... I went and cooked a microwave pizza and went into Lolos room to have a picknick with Vira. After that the man still dared to stay there! Balls of steel my friend, rock hard balls of steel. My next plan of action involved me going to lie down on my bed until Chris actually got home. This worked wonderfully well, to well, when I told Chrissippoo about the man he thought I was a slight bit insane.
Apparetly my Tripple L.s new code name is Lotion. At at least thats what Lolos dad calls her. Its funny, I dont remember what we told him her name was but seriously did he think it was Lotion? Maybe a freak typo?! Oiy oiy, Tripple L. + Meat Man + Lotion = MIND NUMBING
Figures have a life of there own I think. Its all left up to interpritation. Like Lolos Final Fantasy X figures, Lulu is the mom, Symore is the kid, plus, Im pretty sure Vivi's the daddy. Makes sense really. Two black mages both with single consanant single vowle names Vivi, Lulu, I would think there love child would be like Lili or Vuvu but hey, thats just me. Symores a nice name I guess.
You know what was alot of fun. In Super Smash Brothers Melee you got trophies right, and then you could view them all on a table and zoom in and out. Chrissippoo and I used to look at them and makeup lil comments all the time. It was wonderful because everytime we got a new trophy the entire layout changed dramatically!
I want to create things but theres still alot of cleaning and oraganizing to do. Maybe this weekend I can get some crafting done. MMmm, Im thinking for holidays of maybe seeing if Lolo would like to make a quilt with me. I always wanted to try one. That and making a hook rug! I really REALLY want to try making cute anime hook rugs! It looks simple enough. I also have this idea that considering waht ive seen of them that I may be able to transfer pixilated sprites into mini rugs for happy anime game fans! Wouldnt that just be the most wonderfulness ever!
I apparently like exclimation points today...!
Two days of Midshifts lay ahead. I dont mind midshifts really, It will be nice to be able to get out of work and come home to work on some organizing and cleaning. Things I would like to get done this week would be: Help Lolo unpack and organize, finish putting the rest of my stuff away, move the rest of the stuff over from moms. Then theres some gaming involved and crafting along the way that I would like to throw in there.
Its amussing, Lolo is right next to me typing and sometimes I feel like were in compitition of typing, like if I dont type faster then her the whole world will be obliterated!!! Oh Noz!
Roes quitting at work, it was only a matter of time. Ive been there three months and its always the same, Robs dad, Roes mom, and there traped in an unhappy marriage. They dont see how much there arguing confuses, upsets, and unsettles the three children (Kevin, Myself, Taylor)
Alright Im off to stare at half
naked mormen men, apparently thats what Nicoles looking at... fricken creepy! Thats about as good as the Nuns having Fun calander!
Friday, September 14, 2007
You Found Me@ 09:50 a.m.
Last night was the first night that I got to sleep in my new appartment. Not bad really, especially considering we didnt have a bed because by the time I got out of work it was to late to move one. Its a very addorable place, one room upstairs (everyones calling it a foiyer or something) then down a little bit of stairs to the kitchen/living room, the only seperation between the two is a couch. Very nice because the two chefs said its beter this way since they want company when they cook. Understandable I guess, I myself cannot be bothered to deal with something such as cooking, its far to below me... Two bedrooms, bathroom with a tub and pantry. Of course my bedroom is the one with the walk in closet! Its locatd by the trainstation, very close to work wich is lovely.
Last night I moved the rest of my children in. They were not happy at all, Shana especially was hissing and spitting all the way! The other two used the buddy system and Vira as kinda just happy to be on the tallest object in every room.
Theres still alot of cleaning that has to be done, then unpacking and organizing ut so far at least the living room looks a little cozzy, TV's in the corner with a shelf full of stratagy guides and a case full of cames on either side of it.
I got to bring my dual love seat rocker recliner that I love, Im very pleased about that. Since I first shaw the idea I had always wanted one. Mom put the thought into my head that it would be great fun to play games while sitting in one! Im sure it will to!
Roomates::
Myself- of course theres me, it would be kind of strange if I wasnt living in my own apparment while talking about it. I would like to think that out of our three-O Im the creative one, at least then I can find a nitch for myself.
Chrissippoo- He gets to be one of my chefs, hes very game orientated and Im sure thers alot he wants to do with his life but im afraid he my never get a chance to do them. I worry for him because of that. Its not me thats holding him back im sure but more like life. Were not rich we cant all go to school and buy everything we want. Sometimes just working is all we can do. But at least he seems content as long as he can play with the newest eletrnic gadgitz!
Lolo- Instant friend and lovely cute person is our musician.
She likes to make things like I do but her personality leads her to music a tad more where as mine leads me to difrent forms of art. She had a bad experience last year living with roomates and im determined to make this experience good for her. I dont want her to be scared and I care to much about her and chris to let either of them down no mater what!
The Cats:
Shana- Shes kind of being a baby about this whole thing she makes hidouse moaning sounds randomly to try and get my attention... like just now I had to figure out how to get her out from under the fricken couch! Shes fat, and has to learn that while the other cats can go and hide she cant go in those places! So dumb!
Vira- Like I said shes happy as long as she can sit on the highest object in every room. I wonder if thats because when she was little we used to take her for car rides. I know a cat going for a car ride?! She liked it though because we would always get her a wendys burger to nibble on. This might explain her gluttony for people food... Our Tripple L (Land Lady Lord) even kissed her. Such a good kitty!
Miyu and Momo- my two darlings that got fixed two days ago. The recovery is going very well, Miyus a bit skittish in this new home but Momos adating well as long as Chrissippoo is around or as long as she can shaddow Miyu. Its adorable to see them slinking around togeather!
The onlything that makes me a bit nervious is being able to hear the Tripple L's footsteps above us. I like having a basement appartment but I keep thinking shes going to come in here. Honesty I think she just wants to do her laundry wich is downstairs here with us on the other side of my bedroom wall but mom made me a susspciouse person by nature.
Shanas under the couch again...
Chris went to work, Lolo went to work and Im here alone now with my cats. I should clean but... Its kinda lonly and I dont know where to start... maybe the bathroom?
Vira keeps meowing and when I look at her she stops. Its driving me nuts!
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
